the idiosyncratic nature of porn preference, part three

me: let me explain why i think this clip is an artistic marvel:

Charlie: ok

me: http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=79c791b8b8c4b6adad16

forgive the title

[“tight pigtailed teen jammed on the dinner table”]

so, obv the thumbnail is amazing

the amount of foreskin is too much for my taste

and i hate the rough bj middle of vid

but the beginning and end

are so graphic

in a way that is showcased by the glass

and lack of it being in the girl’s mouth

at the end, you can see his dick like jumping out of his foreskin

like, the contractions are magnified by the table and lack of mouth for it to grip

and the cum is maybe even a little gross, because it is thick and not abundant and left there to play with afterwards (which i love but you hate)

Charlie: ok wow this is giving me a lot to look forward to ha

me: but the vid showcases cock in a way that most don’t

Charlie: its taking forever since im on shitty wireless

hmm ok nice

me: also, the best part is that the girl looks like blair from gossip girl

[pause the video at 5:22 for best results]

Charlie: hahaha

i still havent seen gossip girl

i really need to get into that show

i know ill love it

me: yeah

and maybe you will even like the life-sized penis in this vid

but i’d say they are equally trashy

me: the vid and gg, that is

Charlie: hahaha

Charlie: my first impression is that i wish the guy wasnt so like eastern european looking

[he looks like gaston from beauty and the beast; pause the video at 14:20 and compare to page two of google image search results, for best results]

me: yeah, i mean also we could do with out the ping pong clearly

Charlie: haha yeah

i dont mind that though

i love hilarious set ups

[from 16:21-16:28 it looks like he is using his dick as a cue stick]

me: never have i ever seen a glass ping pong table

[seems dangerous]

Charlie: ok one thing i dont like

starting to S D over the pants/boxers

oh i guess its all part of the ping pong game ha

me: hmm, i love mouths trailing over underwear

partially because i like the sensation

of getting licked through pants

Charlie: im sure the sensation is great its just for some reason underwear or pants getting covered in spit really grosses me out

so i like cant get past that

so im fine with like all kinds of rubbing just not actual spitty mouth on pants/underwear ha

me: ha, you are so interesting

what ground rules

no cum once out of the body, no non-human parts in vag, no spit on underwear

Charlie: yes hahaha

Charlie: ok finally his D is out

ok now the BJ is getting rough, i agree a little bit weird

his D is decently good but i just see like so many incredibly hot Ds in my gay porn sites

ok now theyre on the table…

i like when people do it in the position theyre in in porn just for viewing purposes

i like the way her tits flap

like that there is some kissing

i wish he would grab her neck or something though

or like pull her hair or head back

me: hmm, if you watched gg you would know that the nape of the neck is chuck’s kryptonite

Charlie: how many hot guys are there on gg?

ewwww this fingers in his mouth then fingers in her mouth thing is gross

im fine with him putting his fingers in her mouth but the alternating is weird

also i hate that in this position he looks like a frog

oh ok good theyre switching

oh ugh for purposes of porn though i dont like girl on top

i hate seeing the girls asshole

me: i love girls on top

i also like girls assholes in real life, though not so much in porn

but fingers in mouths is lame

i had this hs bf who liked seeing me lick my fingers

Charlie: hahaha

me: partially i think it was like, “ohh, my gf is sooo comfortable with her body”

for me is was like, “um, so i have to like emphatically eat my own cum?”

not that i cared

it was just superfluous

Charlie: yeah i feel you

like i have no problem with girls licking their fingers and thereby eating their cum

but yeah its nothing that great

but guys licking their own cum after they jerk off

makes me want to vomit

ok the part where he has his D on the table and shes like lapping at it and theres all this spit is absolutely disgusting too haha

thats another thing that grosses me out, spit like hanging off a D

or out of a girl’s mouth when shes giving head

maybe in real life im ok with that

but in porn im not

though now i totally get what youre saying about

this vid showing off the D in a way that few other if any pornos do

me: i love the spit part

but i have to say that what confuses me in porn

is that in real life my nose drips, my eyes water, i drool all over my face

obv so unappealing

but if you were really giving good head it would happen

Charlie: right yeah

but its like

in porn people, especially the women, are usually fake

and you usually think of them as, essentially, cum dumpsters

you dont want to see your cum dumpster’s true bodily functions

you just want her to be a doll with a pussy that gets wet, a mouth that sucks, a pretty face, and nice tits

that sounds really awful but thats how guys think of it

i mean i doubt im telling you anything you didnt know

me: i love the phrase “cum dumpster”

i prefer to think of it as “cum recepticle,” myself

although, in hs i dumped a bf (the eating vag fluids one) who i thought treated me like a “cum rag.” i think such a phrase was evoked in a kevin smith movie.

clerks, if i had to guess.

Charlie: yes i think it may have been clerks

i have a friend that loves to call girls he hates cunt rags ha

me: mmm, that is a good phrase because it is evocative of the period

Charlie: yeah it is

though its also somewhat timeless

anyway, i gotta get to bed, tomorrow’s our last day skiing so were getting up pretty early to get on the slopes

me: okay, well goodnight

enjoy the snowballing

Charlie: hahaha

thanks

i prefer the term cum swapping its more descriptive of the act

me: mmm

i love cum swapping

Charlie: doesnt change the fact that it is quite possibly the most disgusting thing ever for me to watch

ha my friend puked watching a vid of it

me: cum swapping involves two girls, though, and i think snowballing is just spitting it into the guy’s mouth

Charlie: i was thinking like

well i was assuming it was the same thing as cum swapping once the girl has the guys cum in her mouth

but anyway ok bed!

haha

thanks for that vid